Celsius? Give me a Break!

It is a tribute to our true American spirit and grit that we continue to doggedly refuse to give in to the logic of the metric system.  But the mathematics, some continue to argue.  And I ask, what is mathematics next to tradition?  We are a nation of principles.  No one is going to tell us how to measure.  We've been measuring things for a very long time, thank you very much, over two hundred years to be exact.  And we will not change for those Socialists out there trying to brainwash us into giving up what we have rightfully earned.  No.  That's not the way we do business.  We are proud to measure with the yard stick and the pound.  Because that's the way the Founding Fathers did it.  And if it was good enough for the crafters of our Blessed Constitution, well then, it's good enough for us.  Amen.

The Imperial system is arbitrary, the naysayers cry.  You're kidding me.  The distance light travels in a fraction of a second?  Who can measure that?  I mean, talk about arbitrary.  These so-called scientists think they can just come in and take over the world.  Well I'll tell you something.  We are too great of a nation to allow that to happen.  We will stand by our out-dated, nonsensical, irrational ways for as long as we please because we are Americans, through and through.  We will continue to measure in gallons, quarts, pints, fluid ounces, gills, hogsheads, perches, roods, acres, thoues, inches, yards, chains, furlongs, miles, leagues, fathoms, cables, nautical miles, links, rods, more chains, minims, fluid scruples, fluid drachms, degrees farenheit, grains, non-fluid drachms, ounces, pounds, stone, quarters, hundred weights, and tons because that's how we've always done it.  And if that ain't the best reason of all, then call me Queen of Sheba.  Americans, Stay true.  Stay strong.  Say no to metric.  


  1. Up here in The Great White North, I am mocked by my husband for not having switched my weather app over from F to C. I "get" C and have lived in C-centric countries before, but F is just in my bones, I guess.

  2. Hi neighbor, Can I borrow a hogshead of beer?

    I want to secretly change all golf measurements from yards to meters, so everyone I golf with is using the wrong club. It's my only chance...

    I think it's funny we love some metric measurements and not others. My car is 3.0 liters of engine, and 2 liter bottles of soda are standard. Yet we love degrees F and miles, etc.